October 2019 - Jackson

Taylor is 36, Savannah is 10. (Brittany Lewis is 27, Andrew Welsh is 26).

It's definitely not appropriate for a divorced 36-year-old man to sit down at the end of the day and have some wine with his 27-year-old nanny. At least that's what Taylor Jackson thought before he had realized he had fallen for her, for good. At that point, he couldn't even care less. He just wanted to be with her.

At first, they just talked. He told her about himself, his childhood and later, his failed marriage. He wasn't ashamed of admitting that his wife had left him for another man. The nanny already knew – she knew he was alone with his 10-year-old daughter. It wasn't an easy job that he had been given.

At some point, she had reached out for his hand and the tone of their relationship had changed.

Sometimes, he feels guilty. “Brittany”, he then says. “Have you talked with Savannah's dance teacher?”

He asks about his daughter because he wants to know. He cares. But he also asks because she is the real reason this beautiful woman is sitting at that table right now. Or at least, she should be. That's why he feels guilty.

But the girl, or the woman – Taylor is confused, he doesn't know what he should call a 27-year-old – answers. She tells hims everything about his little girl, every little detail without forgetting about anything.

It's October and the mornings are getting colder and colder. He bought a car, but he really just bought it for Savannah. He doesn't want her to take the school bus, so he gives her a ride every morning, and then later picks her up at 3PM. He figures a car is a must for a single parent.

He bought a car, but that doesn't mean they are financially stable. They are, for now, but what about in 4 years?

He's 36 and a professional basketball player. He is familiar with the statistics – most professionals retire before the age of 40. He doesn't have any serious injuries and he still is in a relatively good shape, but there is no denying the fact that he is getting a little old – for a basketball player, at least.

At the age of 19, he had made the choice of not going to college and focusing on becoming a professional athlete. Back then, there had been just him. His whole life had consisted of playing basketball, and nothing else. It was the only thing he could do.

Now things are different. He is a divorced man with a child. It isn't just about him and his needs anymore – there is a little girl, his daughter, who needs to be fed and taken care of. He has responsibilities.

He is keeping his eyes open for any other possibilities, but it isn't looking good. There really isn't anything else he can do, or is even legally qualified to try. There's just basketball.

Taylor normally isn't the kind of guy to worry about anything, but when it comes to the future of his daughter, he'd do anything.

At least he isn't alone. Brittany cooks, washes dishes and most importantly, looks after Savannah.

Without her, the house would probably just explode. She takes care of their laundry and she does it good.

Taylor is constantly looking for excuses to be with her. She's folding some sheets, and he walks in on her.
“How's everything going?” he asks, acting casual.
“Everything's great”, she answers, and gives him one of those smiles that could melt an iceberg. She is so warm and kind, perfectly down-to-earth and reasonable; nothing like his ex-wife.

The state of their relationship has been perfectly clear for some time now – but only for the two of them. They haven't kissed yet, and aren't planning on doing so anywhere in the near future, but sometimes they do steal a quick moment of intimacy while no-one's watching. She places her hands behind his neck and he buries his face in her sweet-smelling hair. They feel like back in high school, or as if their togetherness was something forbidden.

But it only lasts for seconds. They've barely even touched, yet they already need to let go. There's a huge electric connection between the two of them – it almost feels like three bolts.

Brittany's most important job is to keep Savannah's mind occupied while her dad is away at practice. She does a great job, and they both like each other a lot.

Savannah hardly ever sees her mother. She moved away two years ago and is now living in Portbridge with the man she left Taylor for. She is a world-class ballet dancer and doesn't really have time for her daughter. It is sad, especially since she has always been Savannah's greatest role model.

Taylor accepts the fact that little Savannah wants to be exactly like her mother when she grows up. She is only 10. She sees her idealized – she only remembers all the good things about her.

Savannah wants to teach her dad how to dance. He might be athletic, but when it comes to dancing, he is a bit clumsy.

Taylor loves his daughter more than anything. He knows he's making a fool of himself right now, but if that's what it takes to make this little girl laugh, he'd do it again and again and again.

Savannah pretty much takes care of herself nowadays. She keeps telling everyone how she's already almost a teenager and that way, scares the hell out of her dad.

Already at 10, she has gathered quite the posse around her. Most of her friends are boys, which Taylor oddly finds quite understandable – girls can be a little mean sometimes. One of Savannah's best friend is their neighbor, Noah Sims, whose mom Nicole is a close friend of Savannah's mom. They still keep in touch, although they call each other a lot less frequently nowadays.



~~~

Taylor likes to work out with Andrew Welsh, who is much younger than him but isn't in as good shape as he is. He is trying to convince himself that age isn't everything – it's all about talent. Andrew doesn't play basketball – he is a minor league soccer player – but they both share a mutual passion for going to the gym.

They're both guys, so the atmosphere tends to get a little competitive. Andrew isn't weak, not at all – but Taylor knows he can beat him.
“Hop off”, he says to him, “it's my turn.”

“Fine”, Andrew gasps. “Let's see what you've got.”

Taylor hops on the treadmill and starts to run. At first, he keeps the pace slow – he's warming up, getting ready for the real act. Then, little by little, he speeds up – now he's really running.

Andrew sighs. “Seriously dude”, he says, “I get it – you're a show-off. There's no need to make me cry.”

They move on to the punching bags. Taylor holds the bag for Andrew who starts to punch it as hard as he can.
“It's not fair”, Andrew keeps complaining. “You're bigger than me. You're older than me!”

Taylor doesn't say anything back – he just holds the bag.

“Come on”, he then starts pushing him. “You're 26. You can do it.”

“I know that, old man”, Andrew roars and kicks harder than he ever has.

They go to the exercise bikes and start racing.

“So tell me about her”, Andrew suddenly says.
“What?”
“You know, the girl you're thinking about.”

“I'm not thinking about anyone”, Taylor says and closes his eyes.
“Yeah right.” Andrew gives a sarcastic laugh.
“I'm just thinking about my career.”

A moment of silence.

“Fine”, Taylor gives in. “Her name is Brittany.”

They hop off the exercise bikes and Andrew says: “Go for it.”
“What do you mean?”

“Listen, man. You've been so darn miserable after you got divorced that I can't even bear to look at you. And besides, she's hot.”

Taylor looks at Andrew. “How do you know she's hot?”

Andrew seems hesitant. “Well, I mean – your ex-wife was hot”, he says. “You've got a good taste in women.”

Taylor takes a shower, and thinks about Brittany. Yeah – she is hot. Of course he had thought about it, even though it had been her personality that he had fallen in love with in the first place. He had already once made the mistake of going for someone only for their looks, and that had only ended up in divorce.

Brittany was also smart, and caring.

But yes, Taylor has to admit it, she is also hot.


~~~

It's Thursday night, and time for Savannah's dancing lesson. Her dad is taking her to the Ballet Academy, just like every week.

Brittany is also coming. Taylor had asked her, just in case she wanted to see Savannah dance. Of course she did.

The drive to the Academy is a quiet one, but it doesn't get awkward. It's only about half a mile, anyway.

They get out of the car and Savannah immediately rushes to the locker rooms to get changed.

Taylor walks to Brittany, and looks her in the eyes. “I'm glad you came”, he whispers.
“So am I”, she says softly.

Savannah dances beautifully, Taylor can tell, even though he knows next to nothing about ballet. He looks at his little girl, whose movements are so graceful she might as well fly. When Savannah was little, her mother used to teach her. Taylor knows Tessa was a good dancer, probably one of the best ones in the county. That's why he doesn't blame the little girl for wanting to be like her mom. She wasn't a good mother, or a good wife, but she was a good dancer.

Taylor and Brittany lean on the wall and observe Savannah dance. They stand very closely to each other, almost – but only almost – touching. The music is playing gently, and Taylor can hear Brittany quietly humming.

“She's so good at it”, Brittany finally talks, but manages to do it without breaking the magic of the moment.
“I know.” Taylor smiles. “I'm so proud.”

He still has his eyes on Savannah, but he can sense Brittany looking at him.
“You should be”, she says.

He tilts his head, but she isn't looking at him anymore. She is watching the little dancer.

They are now holding hands. They're the only ones who know, yet he feels like the sparks tingling between them could fill up the whole room.

But Savannah keeps on dancing.


~~~

It's 8PM and Taylor drives to the marina. Their house is just across the street, so he figures they might as well enjoy the rather warm evening before bedtime. Savannah still has some energy left after her dancing lesson and runs to the playground.

Brittany goes with her, but Taylor stays back.

There is a jungle gym on the playground, and Savannah climbs up there. The view is great – she can see the boats, she can see the sea.

But right now, there is something else that catches her attention.

“You look a little cold”, Taylor says and takes a step ahead. It's just an excuse, like always; he just wants to wrap his arms tight around Brittany, and pull her close to his chest.

It's the first time their bodies actually touch. His frame feels even more muscular than she had ever imagined – she is petite, yet her body feels invitingly soft.

He wants to kiss her, but she stops him at the last moment.
“Wait”, she breathes heavily. “Are we really going to do this?”
“Yeah”, he answers, and swallows loudly. “I think we are.”

They hear someone tripping somewhere behind them, and quickly turn around, without letting go of each other.

Savannah looks at them with interest, almost thoughtful. Then – they can see the corners of her mouth slightly moving.

It isn't a smile, but something close to it.


~~~

They put Savannah to bed, and she falls asleep almost immediately. She is 10, but she still likes it when someone kisses her goodnight.

They move upstairs, and he leads her to his bed – the same bed she had made earlier that day. She isn't his wife, but she might as well be.

It's something they've both been waiting for. It's something new, it's all exciting – they have no idea of what to expect.

It's their first real kiss. Her lips are soft and warm, and he is anxious.

“Wait”, she whispers suddenly.
“I know”, he answers immediately. “Let's take it slow.”